Ed Gorman

Ed Gorman has made (so he says) his final post to his blog. If you haven't seen it already, click the link and take a look before you read anything else I have to say.

Ed has done more for the mystery field than just about anybody I can think of, through Mystery Scene and Five Star books, just to name a couple of venues. Five Star has revived careers and launched them. It's given writers a place to publish books that the bigger houses wouldn't touch, books that garnered rave reviews in PW and Kirkus when they appeared. Ed's not Five Star, but he's a driving force.

And that's not all. I suspect that there are dozens of writers, maybe more than that, whom Ed has personally helped out in one way or another. He's been incredibly generous with a lot of us, especially me. I'm not going to list all the ways he's helped me, but I owe him a lot. Believe me.

I love reading Ed's blog, or just about anything he writes. I'm always amazed at his ability to write about movies, books, and other writers, especially the books and writers of the Gold Medal era. I think he has a better understanding of them than just about anyone.

I guess what I'm trying to say here is that Ed better not have made the final post to his blog. I'm counting on his complete and total recovery and his eventual return to blogging. I suspect that there are hundreds, if not thousands, of others who feel the same way. I'm not deleting my bookmark, and that's final.

The Wheelman -- Duane Swierczynski

This must be my month for reading novels about getaway drivers. First came Jim Sallis's excellent Drive, and now The Wheelman, which also begins with a heist gone wrong but which is quite a different book. For one thing, the title character, Partick Lennon, absorbs more punishment than just about anybody I can think of in recent fiction. Even moer than Declan MacManus of D. Daniel Judson's The Bone Orchard. Until I read about Lennon, I considered MacManus the champ, but Lennon, well, you should just read the book and find out.

Are there any other reasons to read the book? Duane Swierczynski's the real deal. First there was Secret Dead Men, a tour-de-force if ever there was one, and now this. It's fast-moving, full of double crosses, triple crosses, and maybe quadruple crosses, the action scenes are so good that you wonder when the movie will be coming out, and the characters are the kind you don't want to meet in a dark alley, or anywhere else except in the pages of a book, where they're all equally terrible and equally entertaining. Anybody can die and any time, and will.

If, like me, you have a little trouble spelling Swierczynski, better sit down and practice. This guy's gonna be around a long time.

Baker Knight, R.I.P.

From the 1950s to the 1970s, Knight wrote almost 1,000 songs. More than 40 singers recorded his tunes, which include the 1970 Presley hit "The Wonder of You" and Martin's "Somewhere There's a Someone" and "That Old Time Feelin'." Nelson and McCartney sang the same Knight hit, "Lonesome Town," decades apart.

Perry Como, Jerry Lee Lewis, Sammy Davis Jr. and Mickey Gilley also recorded some of Knight's songs.

..........................................

Knight went to Los Angeles in 1958 and met Nelson through a mutual friend. Within six months, Nelson's version of "Lonesome Town," a ballad about being lonely in Hollywood, was on Billboard's Top 10, as was its flip side, "I Got a Feeling," another Knight tune. In all, Nelson recorded 21 Knight originals.

I didn't recognize Knight's name when I started reading the article about his death, but I sure do recognize the songs he wrote for Ricky Nelson. Some people might look down on Ricky, but he could rock, witness "I Got a Feeling." He could to ballads, witness "Lonesome Town." I think I'll listen to those two right now. A list of some of Knight's credits is here.

Wallace & Gromit

By now you know how this goes. While you were watching an obscure film noir, or maybe a more recent crime flick, I was at the mall watching a feature-length cartoon. Not only that, but the movie itself was preceded by another short animated cartoon featuring the penguins from Madagascar, which I confess I haven't seen. It was called The Madagascar Penguins in A Christmas Caper, so I suppose, what with the penguins getting above-the-title billing, that they were pretty popular in the earlier movie. I'm not sure I like Christmas shorts in October, but I thought it was pretty funny, another riff on the WWII escape movies that Chicken Run pulled off so wonderfully.

But I digress. I was going to talk about the W&G movie, which I thought was hilarious. The fellas (Okay, one fella and a dog) have set up a business called Anti-Pesto. It's a pest-control concern, of course, and the pests are the rabbits that are eating all the vegetables people are growing for the annual giant vegetable contest. There's romance (Wallace and Lady Tottingham), villany ("What ho!") voiced by Ralph Fiennes, a giant were-rabbit, and bows to every Universal horror movie ever made, not to mention a tip of the hat (I'm convinced) to Dastardly and Muttley in their Flying Machines. Plus plenty of jokes that sail over the heads of the kids in the audience but score big with the older guys. What's not to like?

Gallery of Bellydancing Librarians

Yes, I said "bellydancing librarians." The gallery, I regret to says, is (A) not as exciting as the headline makes it sound and (B) does not include Gary Warren Niebuhr.

50 Best Horror Movies?

Walter Satterthwait sent me this link. The Wicker Man is in the top ten, but I still say that any movie in which Christopher Lee's toupee upstages Lee isn't a contender.

The Naked Cowgirl

This being a family blog, I can merely provide a link and not a photo. I guess this is why everybody loves The Big Apple.

The Image of Librarians in Porn

I picked up this site from a post on the fictionmags list. It's a great listing of porn titles about librarians, along with some commentary on a few of the books. Gary Warren Niebuhr probably already owns all of them. Sample titles: Lash the Librarian!, Librarian in Bondage, Librarian in Chains. And so on.

Gator Alert!

Game Warden Catches Gator In East Houston Bayou
Reptile Could Be Returned To Greens Bayou, Released In State Park

HOUSTON -- An alligator lurking in an east Houston neighborhood was caught Thursday morning, KPRC Local 2 reported.

Game wardens caught the alligator in a fresh water canal near a water treatment plant on Nimitz Street at Normandy Street at about 9:45 a.m. after wrestling with the animal for 15 minutes.

Douglas Head, one of two game wardens who caught the gator, said getting the reptile out of the canal was easy. He estimated the 10-foot-long animal weighs about 250 pounds and is at least 60 years old.

The wardens said the gator will either be returned to its home, which they believe is Greens Bayou, or be released in a state park.

Unlike some states, we Texans don't "harvest" gators when we catch them. This link goes to the story. There's a nices slide show, or video if you prefer.

Two Heads are Better Than One

Angelo State gets a two-headed rattler

Associated Press

SAN ANGELO, Texas — Angelo State University is getting an unusual addition to its collection of reptiles and amphibians: a two-headed rattlesnake.

Chris McAllister, a visiting professor of biology at Angelo State University in San Angelo, said he found the snake after turning over 400 to 500 rocks last month at a Christoval-area ranch, where he and students were scouring for interesting specimens.

While two-headed rat snakes and king snakes are relatively common, a two-headed rattler is not, McAllister said.

I picked this up from Dave Barry's blog because it reminded me of my happy years in Brownwood, Texas, and the annual rattlesnake roundup. Brownwood is about 70 miles from San Angelo, and we'd often drive there so that I could visit the used-book stores. I have many, many books that I bought at Ye Olde Fantastic and other stores there. I even have a T-shirt somewhere that I got when I ran in the San Angelo Road Lizard Fun Run. Ask me sometime to tell you my rattlesnake stories if I haven't told you already. Those were the days.

Happy Birthday, Susan Anton!

The Goldengirl turns 55 today. The '70's wouldn't have been complete without her. There's a mystery-writing connection here, for you trivia fans. But I'm not telling.

Cavalry Man: The Killing Machine -- Ed Gorman

I'm always happy when a new western by Ed Gorman shows up on the paperback racks because I know I'm in for a good time. The title character of The Cavalry Man is Noah Ford, who was a spy and assassin for the North during the Civil War. It's fifteen years or so later, and Ford's a military investigator, looking into the theft of a sort of super-Gatling gun. The person who stole it is Ford's brother, who was also a spy and assassin during the war, but for the South. Ford locates the gun in the prologue, but before he can do anything about it, his brother is murdered, Ford himself is shot up, and the gun has disappeared. Soon after he gets out of the hospital, the four arms dealers who were to bid on the gun start to die, one by one. Ford has to figure out who's killing them and find the gun, not an easy job for a guy with one arm in a sling.

One thing I like about Ed's westerns is that there's always an edge to them, a tinge of sadness and regret. A lot of his characters, including Noah Ford, have been damaged by life in one way or another, and they're just trying to get by the best way they can. And while this is a novel that deals a lot with character, the action and the plot certainly aren't negelected.

There are other things I like about The Cavalry Man, too. For one thing, Ed's writing is always a pleasure to read. And then there are little touches like this one, when Ford is explaining that he likes drinking cold coffee: "I got used to drinking it cold in the war. Had a friend named Daniel Port who preferred it that way."

If you like westerns or mysteries or both, check it out.

You Know You Want a Drink of This!

This Must be Some Kind of Record

Lucky fan is twice in the right spot

By LEE CEARNAL
Copyright 2005 Houston Chronicle

"I never caught one in a game before." — SHAUN DEAN, Lucky fan who caught 2 balls in history-making game

Dean

Chris Burke's homer might not have been the only history-maker in Sunday's 18-inning victory over the Atlanta Braves. The fan who caught it — Shaun Dean of Porter — also caught Lance Berkman's grand slam shot in the eighth.

Crank Up the Lamborghini, Martha!

(10/10/05 - KTRK/ANGLETON, TX) - Houston area drivers can soon hit the open road and speed down the track without getting a ticket.

There's a new 380 acre piece of land near Angleton that's a haven for people who want to see just what their cars can do. The black top is 2.4 miles long and has 16 turns.

...................................

If you want to drive on the ranch, it will cost you. Membership dues are $7,000 plus $150 in monthly fees. The track should be completed next month. The track is available to anyone with any type of car.

This track is about 20 miles from here. I guess I could drive my old Chevy S-10 truck (1991 model) done there and give it a workout, but the fee is just a little out of my price range. Not mentioned in the article is that you can get a "premium" membership for $15,000. That way, you don't have to pay the monthly fees. Sounds like a bargain to me.

Gator Fest

James Reasoner asks today if I know about Gator Fest. Although I've never attended, I've certainly thought about it. It's held just up the road from here, in Anahuac. I really should try to get to Gator Fest next year, I guess.

Astros Win!

Judy and I are Houston Astros fans. We don't go to the games, but we watch nearly every one on TV each year. When we're out driving, we listen on the radio. So naturally we were there for the whole agonizing 18 innings yesterday. I have to admit that I really didn't think the 'Stros could pull it off, even after the big comeback in the 8th and 9th, but they did it. I'm beginning to believe that Roger Clemens is worth every bit of the $18 million he's getting this year. He lost the play-off game that he started, but those three innings he pitched yesterday proved to me he's one of the all-time greats (as if there was ever any doubt).

If You Love Books . . .

. . . then you'll probably love this site. It's pretty amazing. The macromedia flash is very slow to load on my computer, but the wait's worth it. Try it and see what you think.

A Pretty Good List

Entertainment Weekly's EW.com | Feature: Keira Knightley is a butt-kicking babe: "15 all-time best butt-kicking babes"

My Guess is That They Came from the Sewers

NYNewsday.com
BY DEBORAH S. MORRIS
STAFF WRITER

October 8, 2005

A Queens auto body shop mechanic found a wild surprise on his way home from work last week -- two baby alligators abandoned in a tank dumped in the back of a decrepit car.

"His car was parked nearby and he saw them and brought them home," Hector Cepeda, whose roommate found the two alligators in Brooklyn, said Friday. "They were in a dry tank with no food or nothing."

You're Not Ready for Halloween . . .

. . . until you've carved a pumpkin.

Now this is What I Call "Hat Hair"!

Darain Housen shows off his 'hairy hat'. - NORMAN GRINDLEY

DARAIN HOUSEN HAS not taken off his hat for the last 20 years. He bathes, he sleeps and does everything possible in it. It is a perfect fit.

But unlike other hats, his is not made of cloth but from the very hair on his head which is why it cannot be removed.

Housen has been sporting his 'natural hat' hairstyle for the last 20 years. The 40-year-old barber who lives in Somerset, St. Thomas said he came up with the idea after some of his friends decided to wear hats to a party but he could not find one to wear.

"Mi an dem fi go a di party but di three of them had caps an' mi had none so mi get two mirror one behind mi and di other in front of mi an' mi trim mi hair like a cap an' go a di dance," said Housen.

Flightplan

Yes, it's happened again. While you were gleefully watching all the discs in your new Val Lewton collection, I (movie slut that I am) was attending Flightplan. And the reason? I've confessed this before, I'm sure, but for those of you with failing short-term memories (like me), here's the sad truth: Judy and I often base our movie attendance not on the quality of the films involved but on the times they happen to be playing. Today, Flightplan fit right into our schedule. So we went.

I'd heard from one inveterate moviegoer that this was a really good thriller. I don't agree. I thought it was okay, maybe about a C. You know the story, right? Jodie Foster's on this big plane, and her six-year-old daughter disappears. Or does she? Jodie seems to be the only one aboard who's actually seen the kid, and Jodie's been under a lot of stress lately, what with the recent death of her husband and all. So maybe she's just nuts. We in the audience know better of course, because she's Jodie Foster. No way is she nuts. Naturally we wonder what the heck's going on, and the search for the kid begins. Luckily Jodie is jet-propulsion engineer and knows all about the plane, including a bunch of stuff you wouldn't think would be important to an engineer. I won't say any more about the plot except to mention that there are several things that struck me as highly unlikely if not totally implausible. But in this kind of movie, you expect that kind of thing.

Darwin Award Alert!

local6.com - Problem Solvers - Alligator Bites Woman Trying To Feed It By Hand: "Alligator Bites Woman Trying To Feed It By Hand"

A 25-year-old woman in Melbourne, Fla., was treated at a hospital Thursday after an alligator jumped out of the water and bit her hand as she tried to feed it by hand, according to a Florida Fish and Wildlife Conservation Commission news release.

The 3-foot alligator bit Danielle Rivera, of Palm Bay, Fla., Thursday afternoon at Crane's Creek in downtown Melbourne.

Blonde Lightning -- Terrill Lee Lankford

Last night I read Terrill Lee Lankford's new novel, Blonde Lightning. By coincidence, Lankford has a long post up on Ed Gorman's blog tonight, so you should check it out.

But about Blonde Lightning. It's a sequel to Earthquak Weather, which I mentioned a while back. Like that book, Blonde Lightning could be called a crime novel, but it's also a book about Hollywood, about how a low-budget movie gets made, about friendship, about relationships, about life and death and chance. (I even suspect there's a Conway Twitty fixation lurking in there somewhere, but I can't find the Harold Jenkins reference again, so I could be wrong. I'm not wrong about the Twitty part, though.) Anyway there's a lot going on.

The narrator is once again Mark Hayes, who's not really a very nice guy. You kind of forgive him because all he really wants to do is make movies, and he keeps getting dragged into things by Clyde McCoy, the writer who plays a prominent part in Earthquake Weather. Clyde wants to make movies, too, but he has even fewer principles than Mark. Their relationship is at the heart of the novel, and I was reminded a little bit of The Long Good-Bye (the Altman movie version more than the Chandler novel). Hayes isn't great at relationships, and it's no surprise that the ones he's involved in never end well. Hayes is a survivor, however, as he proved in the earlier book. He'll do what it takes to get by, even if it's something he'd really rather not be involved in. His ethics are his own, as someone once said, and they're flexible.

I liked Earthquake Weather quite a bit, and Blonde Lightning is just as good. Maybe better. You should read them both, in the proper order. So go get started.

Back by Popular Demand

Okay, maybe not. But I nevertheless couldn't resist posting a few more of those great old Emsh covers over on the photoblog. As usual I recommend clicking on the covers to see the larger versions.

You, Too, Can Learn to Wrestle Alligators -- Cheap!

Would you believe that for only 50 bucks you can learn to wrestle alligators? In Colorado? Well, you can. Check it out right here.

Makes a Fella Proud to Be a Texan

From the Montgomery County Courier:

The American Veterans in Domestic Defense will have rallies Saturday at six of the Montgomery County Library branches.

"These libraries have become polluted with written and pictorial pornography at the expense of quality literature," said spokesman Jim Cabaniss, a resident of The Woodlands. "For several years now the people in Montgomery County have complained about this decadence to the proper authorities with little or no results."

"We're not going to burn books but we're going to cut them up," he said. There are 70 specific books they are complaining about.

Anna Does D. C.

Thanks to Jeff Meyerson, here's a link to a great article filled with advice for my homie, Anna Nicole Smith, the most famous person ever to live in Mexia, Texas. She was a student at Mexia High School for a couple of years, and she was in a biology class taught by my brother. Now, he's living out a quiet retirement in Point Enterprise, Texas (not even on Google Maps), while Anna Nicole, who probably doesn't remember a single thing about biology (well, the way it was taught in that class, anyway) is in the headlines, on the TV screens, and generally being famous. It all goes to show what a good teacher can do for your career.

The War of the Worlds -- with Bunnies

OK, you know you've been waiting for this. It's the George Pal version of The War of the Worlds, in 30 seconds. With Bunnies.

Paranormal Investigations of Texas

So I'm in the Wal-Mart parking lot this morning, loading a six-pack of Propel into my little truck, when I look across the lane in front of me and see a spare-tire cover on the back of some vehicle emblazoned with the phrase "Paranormal Investigations of Texas." I have to admit I'd never heard of this organization, but there was also a website URL. Sure enough, it's sort of like Ghostbusters, but more professional. One of the group has already written a book, but I'm betting there's a lot of material there for a good mystery novel. I'm too lazy to write it, though.

Drive -- Jame Sallis

Gee, it seems like only yesterday that I was sort of lamenting the fact that nobody was publishing books the length of Gil Brewer's Three-Way Split, which clocks in at 128 pages. Turns out it wasn't only yesterday, it was the day before. And along comes the Poisoned Pen Press with James Sallis's Drive to prove me wrong. What we have here is 158 lean, mean pages of hardboiled story-telling, a Gold Medal novel for the new millenium. (Okay, I know the millenium is five years old now, but that's still new in terms of millenia.)

Not that this is really a Gold Medal book. Gold Medal writers went in for linear story-telling, and Sallis doesn't, not here. His style is a bit different, but it's just as rewarding, and the book is full of references to movies, books, even opera.

Drive is the story of a man called Driver. He says that's all he does. His day job is doing stunt driving in the movies. He moonlights as a getaway driver for robbers. He's very good at both jobs, and, as we discover in the course of the book, he's good at a few other things as well. The plot is a classic one: after a job, Driver is stuck with a pile of money that isn't his. Somebody wants it back. In this case, Driver wants that somebody to have the money, and it's returned. Things don't end there, however. That's just the beginning. We learn about all of this in bits and pieces, and not in chronological order. Mixed in with that story are other stories, about Driver's job in the movies, about his early life, about some of the people he knows. There's even a cat. It's all very fine stuff, indeed.

Apparently the Big Name publishers wouldn't touch this book because of its length. Poisoned Pen took a chance, and it's paid off with rave reviews and even some Hollywood interest. I hope the book sells as well as it deserves to because it proves what we Gold Medal readers already knew: a book doesn't have to be 400 pages long to be awfully damned good.

A Great Car Story

TheDenverChannel.com - Automotive - Man Has Model A Ford He Bought In 1929: "Man Has Model A Ford He Bought In 1929"

Click the link to see a picture of the car. Very cool.

Another Idea Whose Time Has Come

Offbeat News :: Bishop backs panty parties to spread Church message: "Evangelism and erotic underwear are rarely linked outside the tabloid newspapers. But a new book backed by a Church of England bishop urges Christians to spread the message to their friends and neighbours by hosting lingerie parties."

Three-Way Split -- Gil Brewer

Ed Gorman reviewed this one the other day, so I pulled the book off the shelf to re-read it. The only thing I have to add to Ed's comments is that the book is only 128 pages long. That's right. 128 pages. And there's more story there than you'll find in a lot of the current 400+ page doorstops, if you ask me, which I realize you didn't. Straightforward, clear-eyed storytelling, no wasted words, just what you'd expect from a classic Gold Medal novel. Great stuff.

Mystery*File Update

The latest "Gold Medal Corner" has been posted at Steve Lewis's Mystery*File site. There's my little essay on Marvin H. Albert, plus some spiffy cover photos and Steve's Albert bibiliography. Check it out!

Science Fiction Adventures

Ed Gorman talks about reading a Robert Silverberg space opera in a digest-sized magazine called Science Fiction Adventures, edited by Larry Shaw. This was one of my favorites back in the Old Days, and one reason was the covers. So I scanned some of them and posted them here. Be sure to click on them and enlarge them for a much better look.

At a lot of conventions I've been on panels about the fact that young people don't seem to be reading much SF these days. My theory about this is simple. They're not reading SF because there are no more magazines like Science Fiction Adventures. Today's SF mags are aimed at a more "mature" audience. The stories are no doubt more "literary" than the ones of my youth, but they don't have the same kind of appeal. (And you sure don't see covers like the ones on SFA any more.) It's no wonder that kids coming to SF now are more likely to come by way of gaming, TV, or movies. And it's no wonder that tie-in novels are more popular than the kind of SF that gets praised in reviews and printed in the magazines.

Bob Skinner -- Some Good News

Some of you may remember my post about how worried I was about my friend Bob Skinner, a fine writer and all-around good guy, because of the flooding in New Orleans. I don't think Bob would mind if I printed a bit of his e-mail message of yesterday, one that cheered me up immensely. It just goes to show that sometimes things do sort of work out in the way you'd hope they would. I think it'll put a smile on your face, too. Here's what Bob had to say:

"We were contacted by an inspector with Small Business Administration, met
him in Kenner yesterday at 8:00 A M, and he got us past the police
roadblocks into our neighborhood. You wouldn't believe it. It looks like a
war zone. Hundreds of trees are down everywhere, some snapped in half,
others uprooted and catapulted into homes. Debris everywhere, including
boats miles from their anchorages, ruined cars by the square yard. But we
got to our house and found several miracles in progress. Jean's studio was
totaled, ditto the living room, kitchen, and laundry room. But upstairs,
the bedroom, my study, and the attic just the way I left them, including
Jean's birthday gifts lying intact on the floor. All my books in place
without a sign of damp stain or mold."

"No Class Chick" -- J. J. Solari

Last December I did a post on a short story called "No Class Chick" from Easyriders magazine. The story is by J. J. Solari.

Today the following comment was added to that post: "I just read the three comments about me regarding the story I wrote, 'No Class Chick.' Tell these three people I'm gonna be publishing a book of previously unpublished stories pretty soon. Sure, 'No Class Chick' was funny. But I hadda sidestep a lotta shit. Now I don't. Oh and also I'm a lot funnier now."

I'm sure a lot more than three people will be looking forward to the publication of that book.

Maestro of the mean

Scotsman.com News - Features - Maestro of the mean: "Maestro of the mean

SUSAN MANSFIELD

THE LAST TIME ALLAN GUTHRIE WENT back to his native Orkney, he noticed that the local paper had started a crime column. The police chief was chewing over the latest act of law-breaking on the island. 'Some old lady's plant pot had been taken out of her garden and dumped in the middle of the road,' he says, trying to smother a smile. 'Not the stuff of dark crime fiction.'"

I got this link from Duane Swierczynski over at the Secret Dead Blog. Click it for the full profile of Al (Sunshine) Guthrie, author of the acclaimed Two-Way Split and Kiss Her Good-Bye.

I got this link from Duane Swierczynski over at the Secret Dead Blog. The article's fairly long, and it's a fine profile of Al (Sunshine) Guthrie. Must reading for fans of Two Way Split and Kiss Her Good-Bye.

Steve Lewis Goes Electric

Steve Lewis, the editor and publisher of Mystery*File has decided to become a part of the paperless society, and you can now find his zine (accurately subtitled "The Crime Fiction Research Journal") on-line. It's not yet fully loaded, but there's some excellent material there already: Ed Lynskey's fine article on Stephen Greenleaf, some additions to the Cornell Woolrich bibliography as well as Mike Nevins' column on Woolrich, Marv Lachman's "Crime of My Life" column, key information about Mortimer Post (and if you never heard of him, check out the article), and much more to come. Click the link and check it out.

Serenity (Now)

Okay, it's 1956. Maybe 1957. Everyone else in the family is watching TV in the back room, but little Billy Crider is in his own room with the latest issue of Imaginative Tales. (Motto: Action-Packed Science Fiction!") There's a great cover, and there are stories by, say, Robert Silverberg, Randall Garrett, Ivar Jorgenson, Milton Lesser, Robert Moore Williams, Alexander Blade. And best of all, there's a "full-length novel" by Edmond Hamilton. To heck with TV. Little Billy Crider is going to be blissfully happy for a couple of hours with blasting ray guns, ships hopping into hyperdrive, hideous aliens, square-jawed heroes, and tough space babes.

Fast-forward to 2005. Old Bill Crider goes to a theater to see Serenity. He never saw Firefly, the TV series it's an extension of, so he doesn't know what to expect. But what he gets is that issue of Imaginative Tales, a little updated, maybe, but still pretty much the same characters, same story, same sense of fun, and for two hours Old Bill is is blissfully happy, transported back to a time he never thought he'd visit again. George Lucas might have made this movie once upon a time, but now he's completely unable to (if we're to judge by the last three Star Wars episodes). I'm glad that someone knows how, and now I'll have to find Firefly on DVD.

Another Signing

Last night Clyde Wilson and I did a signing at the River Oaks Bookstore. Everyone should collaborate on a book with someone like Clyde. If only his family turns out, you're guaranteed to have a big crowd at the signing. Clyde has (I think) seven children, and I can't begin to keep up with the grandchildren. They all support the patriarch, too. And as I mentioned in a post about a previous signing, Clyde knows all the rich and famous in Houston. A notable at the signing yesterday was Dr. Denton Cooley, of the Texas Heart Institute. And did I mention that you should buy a copy of the book? Well, you should.

One More Sign of the Apocalypse

I couldn't resist linking to this survey that I read about on Dave Barry's blog. If these are the world's favorite songs, it's no wonder there are hurricanes in the Gulf, wars in the Middle East, and soaring gasoline prices. The End Is Near. I need to get myself a sandwich board and stand on a street corner in Houston to warn everybody. But that would just cause another apocalyptic evacuation. So to speak.

Thuglit

Aldo's comment about Psychosomatic reminds me that I should have posted about Thuglit before now. If you want to read Anthony Neil Smith's "Dead Girlfriend," click the link and go to the archives for Issue #2. All the stories are worth a look, so be sure to give Thuglit a look.

Psychosomatic -- Anthony Neil Smith

I'd hoped to buy this book at the Bouchercon and get it signed, but none of the dealers had it. So I resorted to Amazon, and I'm glad I did. This is one sick, twisted book. Naturally I mean that in a good way. You've got your quadruple amputee femme fatale, your various killings (accidental and deliberate), your psychos, your low-level criminal types, your hapless characters who keep thinking they're going to get out of the mess they're in (but you know better), your innocent victims. And plenty more. I'm telling you, this is one wild ride. There are times when you want to look away, but you can't. I'm reminded of the time I was on about the 15th floor of a hotel in San Antonio one dark and stormy night, standing at the window and looking down at the street below. A car was speeding down a cross street, and I could tell that it wasn't going to stop at the light. I could see that the cars that had the green weren't going to stop and weren't aware of the danger. I knew it was going to end badly, but that didn't matter. I couldn't tear my eyes away. Same with Psychosomatic. You'll need to be ready for this one, and after you read it, you'll be eager to see what Smith is going to do for an encore.

Statue to Get Corrective Surgery

Key quote from article: "We may have to take the arm off and get it bent up a little bit more and get his fingers on a staff with an eagle on the end of it . . . ."

Is NOTHING Sacred?

Arrggghhhh!: "Jennifer Hawkins and Michael Caton have been tipped to become castaways and assume leading roles in the movie version of the 1960s comedy favourite Gilligan's Island.

"Less than three weeks after the real life Gilligan - actor Bob Denver - passed away, Adam Sandler looks set to play the Skipper's little buddy on the big screen."

Anna Nicole Smith at the Supreme Court.

Sounds like a great movie, right? But it's for real. The most famous person (the only famous person) from my hometown of Mexia, Texas, is in the news again:

Former Playboy model Anna Nicole Smith is going to the Supreme Court. Justices said Tuesday they would consider Smith's appeal over the fortune of her 90-year-old late husband.

The stripper-turned-reality television star stands to win as much as $474 million that a bankruptcy judge initially said she was entitled to. The case will be argued before the justices early next year.

She has not gotten any money from the estate of J. Howard Marshall II, an oil tycoon who married her in 1994 when he was 89 and she was 26. Marshall, one of Texas' wealthiest men, died in 1995.

At issue for the court is a relatively mundane technical issue: when may federal courts hear claims that are also involved state probate proceedings. But the facts of the case are eye-catching.

The 1993 Playmate of the Year and self-described "blonde bombshell" claims her husband promised her millions but that his scheming son cut her out of the estate.

Those Were the Days -- Dolly Parton

Bum Phillips once said of Don Shula's coaching ability, "He can take his'n and beat your'n and he can take your'n and beat his'n."

So what does that have to do with Dolly Parton? Check out her new CD, Those Were the Days, and you'll have the answer. It's a CD of mostly cover tunes, some of them with the original artists singing along, and in every case Dolly's version is definitive. She can take another artist's song and make it her own, but the reverse isn't true. When she sings one of her own songs, nobody else can top it.

Maybe my favorite song on the new CD is "The Twelfth of Never." You have to be as old as I am, I guess, to remember the Johnny Mathis version, which sold a jillion copies. Dolly's take on the song is about as different from the original as it can be (and Johnny doesn't sing on it with her; Keith Urban does). It's sort of country and bluegrassy, if you can imagine that. When the song's over, Urban says, "You give me chills, Dolly." Me, too. This is a CD I'll be listening to again and again.

Stupid Human Tricks

This morning when I was out jogging, I stopped at a cross street to let a car go by. The woman driving the car was holding her cell phone to her ear with her left hand, steering with her left elbow, and lighting a cigarette with her right hand. I had to admire her skills, but it was a little scary anyway.

Don Adams, R. I. P.

Would you believe he's only sleeping? I wish that were the case. But according to the news reports, Agent 86 has gone to that big Cone of Silence in the sky. As usual, hearing something like this makes me feel ancient, as I remember the show's premier well, and I remember Barbara Feldon, Agent 99, when she was rolling around on a tiger skin for Top Brass. I'm glad she, at least, is still around. The Get Smart DVD set was just about to be released, I think, and this surely would have brought Adams some well-deserved attention. First Maynard G. Krebs, and now Maxwell Smart. Another icon gone.

Catalog Your Books

I have to admit that Library Thing looks very cool. But when would I have time to to it? Even if I started, I'd never get everything on-line.

Public Service Announcement

The following is from Jerry Doolittle's "Bad Attitudes." A reader said that I should publish it "because it's the right thing to do." So here it is.

Would You Pay to Read Thomas Friedman?

I expect by now everyone’s got an opinion on TimesSelect, the New York Times’s paid offering of their columnists and archives. Jay Rosen certainly does, and his makes a lot of sense to me.

The concept that people would actually pay to read a Thomas Friedman column is, to me, indicative of the problems this world currently faces.

But if you’re addicted to Krugman or Rich, you’ve probably already found a site that Rosen points to, Never Pay Retail.

Here’s the blurb supplied by the proprieter, John Tabin:

Each day, today’s regular New York Times op-ed columns will be noted, each with a post title indicating the name of the columnist and the Times’s title for the column. As they become available — usually within a few days — at least one link will be added in the body of each post to a syndicated copy of the column from a news source that doesn’t charge for access.

Shiver Me Timbers!

The archipelago is named after Robinson Crusoe, but perhaps it should have been called Treasure Island.

A long quest for booty from the Spanish colonial era appears to be culminating in Chile with the announcement by a group of adventurers that they have found an estimated 600 barrels of gold coins and Incan jewels on the remote Pacific island.

"The biggest treasure in history has been located," said Fernando Uribe-Etxeverria, a lawyer for Wagner, the Chilean company leading the search. Mr Uribe-Etxeverria estimated the value of the buried treasure at US$10bn (£5.6bn).

........................

The hoard is supposedly buried 15 metres (50ft) deep on Robinson Crusoe island, also known as the Juan Fernández island, home to Scottish sailor Alexander Selkirk, the adventurer immortalised by Daniel Defoe as Robinson Crusoe. Selkirk was dumped on the island and lived alone for four years before being rescued. His exploits brought worldwide attention to the islands.

Revealed: the truth behind the crash that killed James Dean

From The Telegraph: For James Dean fans it has been the ultimate unsolved riddle. Just who was behind the wheel the day the actor, only 24, died?

For 50 years, since his death in a car crash on September 30, 1955, Dean has been portrayed as a daredevil driver whose speeding and recklessness on the road caused his own death.

	American icon: James Dean

Now, new evidence has emerged proving that not only was Dean driving safely, but at a much lower speed than was believed at the time.

Check out the article for more. This was a death that had a big impact on me as a young guy.

50 Greatest Sci-Fi TV Shows of All Time?

Here's the Boston Globe's list. Wonder Woman checks in at #24. I figure the photo of Lynda Carter at the left should put it about ten spots higher in the rankings. The bad news is that you have to register to check it out, or you can use bugmenot.

Galveston, Texas, September 24, 2005

Reuters: Robert Shumake, dressed in a God Bless America shirt, waves the U.S. flag along the seawall with the Gulf of Mexico in the background in the aftermath of Hurricane Rita in Galveston, Texas September 24, 2005. Shumake was celebrating that the city was spared major damage from the storm. Hurricane Rita was downgraded to a Category 1 storm on Saturday with maximum sustained winds of about 75 mph (120 kph), the U.S. National Hurricane Center said in its 11 a.m. EDT (1500 GMT) advisory.

Joe Lansdale and Rita

Joe Lansdale, a writer you've probably heard of and read, lives in Nacogdoches, Texas, a long way from here and supposedly well away from hurricanes. He'd been calling to check on me, worried that I'd be blown away. Now the irony begins. I just got a call from Joe, who has no electric power, who's had a giant limb come through the roof of his house, and whose driveway is blocked by a fallen tree. Here I am in Hurricane Alley, having a high old time. And there's Joe, far inland, suffering far worse effects from Rita. Start sending some of those good thoughts his way, please.

I'm Here

Well, the storm's effects in Alvin, Texas, have been minimal so far. We still have power, which is amazing, considering that we often lose power in just a little rainstorm.

We had high wind last night, but it never got near hurricane force, and we had some rain, but not a whole lot. We were very, very lucky.

And all the good thoughts and encouragement from people who read the blog were a big help to me. I was seriously worried at one point last week, thinking that I'd made the biggest blunder of my life by deciding to stay here instead of leaving. Now I'm feeling pretty good about my choice.

What worries me now is the future. Four major hurricanes in Florida last year. Two major hurricanes all too close to me within a few weeks this year. That doesn't bode well.

Thanks again for your support and encouragement. Believe me, it made a difference.

Hurricane Rita Update #5

It just keeps on looking better. I'm going to bed and sleep through the night's storminess, I think. I don't see any need to stay awake and alert, as it now seems certain that the worst of the weather will be well to the north and east of us. That could change, but right now I'm feeling as if we've really lucked out. Thanks for all the good vibes, and keep 'em coming.

Hurricane Rita Update #4

The storm has taken another slight jog to the right. Every time that happens, I relax a little more because while this is very bad news for Louisiana, it's good news for us. According to the National Weather Service, Galveston is no longer in the "cone of uncertainty." Isn't that a great phrase? I'm reminded of Get Smart's "cone of silence." Anyway, this means that Galveston is no longer a candidate to wind up in the hurricane's direct path. Alvin, being a few miles up the road from Galveston, isn't in the path, either. This doesn't mean that the storm can't fool everybody and move back this way, but things are looking pretty good for us here. Wind? Rain? Sure, we'll get some of both. But the really nasty stuff is a lot less likely.

My Name is Earl

No, not my name. That's the title of a new TV series, the only new show I've seen. I liked it, which is probably the kiss of death. It'll be canceled within the month. Or sooner if the Coen Brothers decide to sue. The show's a direct steal from, er, I mean homage to Raising Arizona. Jason Lee plays Earl, which is the Nicolas Cage role, and even looks a bit like him. The idea is that Earl, a lowdown schemer and petty thief, has a mystical experience while in the hospital and decides that he has to change his karma by repaying everyone he's ever scammed, robbed, cheated, or hurt. He makes a list. It's a really long one. I got several good laughs from the opening show, and I'll be watching again, even if the rest of them have warm and fuzzy endings like the first one. There's enough other stuff to keep things down and dirty. And funny.

Civilization and Its Discontents

E-mail message from a friend whose daughters left town yesterday:

"When there is more time will tell you about the truck driver that got out -- hit my daughter's side window with his hand and told her to let him get in front of her to get gas as he was working and now evacuating. Scared her so much, since it was 9:30 PM, that I talked with her for 30 minutes. That was my second choice -- first was to get to the Teague exit and shoot the s. o. b."

Hurricane Rita Update #3

We're starting to get some wind now, not much, but enough to let us know the storm's on its way. Thin clouds are coming from the Gulf. The serious rain and wind should begin in the middle of the afternoon, with the storm coming ashore early tomorrow. About 36 hours from now, things might be settling back down. I'm not sure how much longer we'll have power here, but I'll post more updates if I can.

The Flood Plain

In a comment below, Cap'n Bob says: "My main worry for you is flooding. Now that I know Hill St. is not on a hill, I wonder if you're above the flood plain. I assume you're furiously moving your books to the attic, or at least the high shelves."

Let's set the Cap'n's mind at ease. We're above the flood plain. When we moved here in 1983, we were told to ask only one question before buying a house: "Did the place flood in 1979?" Why ask that? Because 1979 was (and is) the year that made Alvin, Texas, famous (even before Nolan Ryan). Here's what The Handbook of Texas has to say: "In 1979 tropical storm Claudette dumped forty-three inches of rain near Alvin within twenty-four hours, a state record." Virtually the entire town flooded, but not the house where we live. Of course the drainage has changed over the years, but we don't think we're likely to get anywhere near forty-three inches of rain out of Rita. If we do, we might be in trouble. And if the roof blows off, we'll be in trouble. Otherwise, we'll be dry.

And Stan Burns e-mailed me some good advice: Put the most valuable paperbacks in a couple of plastic garbage bags and stash them where it's most likely not to get wet in any situation. Like in my car in the garage.

Flabbergasted

When I went out for a jog through the deserted streets of Alvin this morning, this thought occurred to me: What are these morons thinking?

This is trash pick-up day in Alvin, and the morons of whom I speak are the ones who've put out their plastic bags full of trash. Do they really think there'll be a garbage run today? Tomorrow those bags are going to become unguided missles in the big wind. The chief moron is the guy who put a twelve-foot pecan limb out for pick-up.

Other things I saw in yards: a traffic cone, four plastic lawn chairs, a TV set, a metal folding chair, a soccer ball, a metal garbage can.

And most of this stuff, including the filled garbage bags, was in front of houses that are boarded up and deserted.

Good grief.

Hurricane Rita Update #2

The scenes of the traffic outside Houston have shown the flaws in the big "evacuation plan." I don't know if anyone's to blame, and of course the intentions were good. (I have a feeling you could ask some of the many stranded drivers about "the road to hell.") Now a bus full of evacuees has exploded near Dallas, and it's far, far worse than anything we've seen so far. I'm watching the scene on TV now, and we're hearing that the bus was filled with the elderly and infirm and that there have been mulitple deaths.

Judy and I are quite hopeful that the worst of Lovely Rita's effects will miss us here in Alvin. If the storm continues the way the National Weather Service is telling us at the moment, that will be the case. Keep those fingers crossed.

Automotive Science Marches On!

DETROIT - Suffering from a rash? Drive a Toyota.

That could well be Toyota Motor Corp.’s next slogan, if the world’s second-largest automaker succeeds in offering cars with a medicated cloth seat cover designed to help heal rashes.

“It’s important for us to continue to push this envelope,” Jim Press, president of Toyota’s U.S. division, told the Reuters Autos Summit on Thursday, referring to a host of features being developed to enhance the driving experience.

....................

Toyota is also looking at a steering wheel that could help diabetics by allowing them to measure their blood sugar levels by simply gripping the wheel.

Taking that a step further, the wheel, in conjunction with other technology, will also be able to gauge a driver’s temperament and blood pressure, adjusting the color of the headlights on the car to warn others of the driver’s mental state.

Hurricane Rita Update

At 10:00 a.m. Rita took another little jog to the northeast. Bad news for folks up the coast, good news for me. If the storm continues to track in that direction, we might be OK, after all.

The highways out of Houston look like a scene from a bad disastrophe flick. Every time I see a picture, I'm glad I stayed here.

Keep those good thoughts going.

Too Late To Run

Thanks to all for the advice, encouragement, and warnings. It's too late to leave, however, since the highways are parking lots and the drive from Houston to Huntsville, about 60 miles, is now taking 12 hours. If worse comes to worst, the community college here in town has a hurricane-proof room (it was once a vault, so it has very thick steel walls covered with brick). I've been in touch with the college president, who's as stupid as I am and is also still in town, and if the storm turns in this direction, we'll go to the college. I'm still confident that things will work out better than that, and that the storm will come in to the south of us, giving us rain and high wind, but nothing of hurricane force.

New Crimespree

The new issue of Crimespree has landed here at the Crider Manse & Hurricane Shelter, and it's a nice diversion. News, reviews, and interviews. Not to mention essays and fiction. Check it out.

Lovely Rita

It seems that Hurricane Rita is taking aim at the Texas Gulf Coast, and panic is in the air. Nobody really knows where the storm will come to shore, but our neighbors to the right have already left, and the ones on the left will be leaving tomorrow. The ones on the right have metal storm shutters, so their windows are safe enough. The ones on the left have boarded up their windows. Judy and I, on the other hand, have done nothing. We have plenty of water and food, so the main inconvenience will be lack of electricity, assuming the windows and roof hold together. We're almost certain to lose power for at least a couple of days if the storm comes in nearby. So if blogging suddenly ceases on Friday or Saturday, you'll know what happened. Otherwise, I'll be here as usual.

Juvies

I was looking through some of my Ace books the other day and enjoying the covers, so I scanned them and posted them here. Be sure to click on the covers to enlarge them. They look even better that way.

Gold Medal Corner -- John McPartland

This is a little essay I did for Steve Lewis's Mystery*File. I'm reprinting it here because Duane Swierczynski recently read a McPartland book and wrote about it in his blog. Now Ed Gorman has joined in the fun with a reprint on his own blog.

Gold Medal Corner
by Bill Crider

If people of a certain age (that would be my age) remember John McPartland at all, it’s probably because of his 1957 “breakthrough” novel, No Down Payment. But the truth is hardly anybody remembers even that. (Try a google search if you don’t believe me.) Probably even fewer people remember that both before and after the publication of his “big” book, McPartland published novels with Gold Medal. And they were good ones.

Probably my favorite is The Kingdom of Johnny Cool (1959). Written years before Mario Puzo thought of The Godfather, this is a crackerjack novel about the Mafia (McPartland calls it the Outfit). The title has a couple of meanings, as there are two Johnny Cools in the novel, one young, one old. The young one is the killer, the man who’s going coast-to-coast to kill five men in one day. How he does it, what he becomes in the process, and what happens to him are just a few of the things the book is about. Although there are only 160 pages, this novel has enough details about the Outfit and the way it operates to make even Puzo blink. I seem to recall that Puzo said he made everything up. McPartland may have done the same, but it certainly sounds authentic, as do the all the details of police procedure that are introduced after the murders. The book had at least two Gold Medal printings, and they probably weren’t small ones, but I’m surprised it didn’t do even better.

Maybe it would have, in a different time. McPartland was restricted by publishing conventions of the 1950s, so he couldn’t be nearly as explicit as Puzo was able to be later on. For example, after a young woman with the unlikely name of Dare Guiness is raped, Johnny takes revenge on the killers by stabbing them with a knife from Dare’s kitchen. And then: “There was a tradition for bodies like these two, a tradition that required the use of the knife once more on each of them. Johnny did this and left the bodies where they lay on the gray sidewalk near the garage.” Readers these days (and probably those days, too) knew what it was that Johnny did, but specificity in that sort of thing seems mean bigger sales. McPartland did his best. And even with the restrictions, this is a brutal book, maybe even a little shocking for 1959, and the ending is a real downer.

But there are a couple of lighter moments, including some snappy patter that wouldn’t be out of place in an Arnold Swarzenegger movie of a few years ago. After a couple of killings in Las Vegas, Johnny gets on a package tour bus and sits down next to a guy counting his winnings. The guy wants to talk:

“Boy, I murdered them here,” he said. “How did you do?”
“I did all right,” said Johnny.

McPartland’s books are well worth reading if you like hardboiled action, as I do now and then, and the writing’s fine, too. The Wild Party is another good one, as are the others I’ve read.

If McPartland was so good, why didn’t he make a bigger impact on the crime field? One reason might be that he died at the age of forty-seven. He was already dead by the time The Kingdom of Johnny Cool was published. Too bad he didn’t stick around longer. A lot longer.

Gold Medal Media Bonus: In 1963, The Kingdom of Johnny Cool was made into a movie with the shortened title of Johnny Cool. It starred Henry Silva and Elizabeth Montgomery, and it made a big impression on me and my date (who’s still my date to the movies, by the way). I thought it would make Silva a big star. He was a brat-packer at the time, and Joey Bishop and Sammy Davis, Jr., make cameos in the movie. The real revelation, though, is Montgomery. Wotta performance! After you see her in this movie, you’ll never be able to think of her as that cute Samantha again.

Non-Gold Medal Media Bonus #1: After you see Johnny Cool (which will be next to impossible, as I don’t believe it’s available), you should watch Jim Jarmusch’s Ghost Dog: the Way of the Samurai (1999). Supposedly it’s based on some French film, and I might be the only major movie critic who noticed that it’s sort of a remake of Johnny Cool. Forrest Whitaker is the star, but the old Mafia guy is (a great touch) Henry Silva.

Non-Gold Medal Media Bonus #2: And after that, see if you can find the movie version of No Down Payment. I’m betting you can’t, but give it a try. It’s one of the better “lost” movies of the 1950s, with Joanne Woodward and Tony Randall, who proves here that he could do a lot more than just play the comic sidekick in movies with Doris Day and Rock Hudson. This is one of the best portrayals of suburbia ever, or at least of what people thought suburbia was like in the 1950s. I’ve never read the book, but I really should, one of these days.

According to this, Lou Ford Could Have Been a Zillionaire. Or at Least a Top Lawyer.

LONDON (Reuters) - "Wanted: psychopaths to make a killing in the markets."

Such an advert will not be appearing in the world's newspapers any time soon, but it may have a ring of truth after research revealed the best wheeler-dealers could well be "functional psychopaths."

A team of U.S. scientists has found the emotionally impaired are more willing to gamble for high stakes and that people with brain damage may make good financial decisions, the Times newspaper reported Monday.

In a study of investors' behavior 41 people with normal IQs were asked to play a simple investment game. Fifteen of the group had suffered lesions on the areas of the brain that affect emotions.

The result was those with brain damage outperformed those without.

The scientists found emotions led some of the group to avoid risks even when the potential benefits far outweighed the losses, a phenomenon known as myopic loss aversion.

One of the researchers, Antione Bechara, an associate professor of neurology at the University of Iowa, said the best stock market investors might plausibly be called "functional psychopaths."

Fellow author, Baba Shiv of Stanford Graduate School of Business said many company chiefs and top lawyers may also show they share the same trait.

Arrrrrrrr, Me Hearties!

It's International Talk Like A Pirate Day: "Media, entertainers, the Internet embrace Talk Like A Pirate Day.

The Art of Dr. Seuss

This weekend Judy and I drove to Thornton, Texas, for a short visit with Judy's mother, who was celebrating her 93rd birthday. We should all be in such great shape, mentally and physically at 93!

On the way home today, we stopped by our daughter's condo in Houston, and the three of us went to an exhibit of Dr. Seuss's art. (Here's a review of the show.) I figured I'd get sued if I used any of the photos we took of the artwork, but I'm sure no one will mind if I use the one of me seated outside the entrance to the show.

The exhibit was arranged chronologically, beginning with Dr. Seuss's earliest work: cartoons and covers for Judge magazine. His characteristic style was already well established. I'm sure you know that he did a couple of cartoons making fun of an insect spray called Flit. The maker's wife saw one, showed it to her husband, and Seuss was hired to do do ads for the spray. And the rest, as we love to say, is history.

My favorite Dr. Seuss book is McElligott's Pool, but I like many of the others almost as well. If I Ran the Zoo, for example. And of course that one about the Grinch. And the two about Horton. And, well, most of the rest of them, too.

My great-uncle, Everett Gee Jackson, was an artist who lived in San Diego, and he and Theodore Geisel were good friends. One of my regrets is that I never asked my uncle for an introduction.

50 Most Awesomely Bad Songs

VH1.com : Shows : 50 Most Awesomely Bad Songs...Ever : Countdown: "It was tough listening but here they are - #50 all the way down to the #1 worst song...ever. Click on song title or speaker icon to listen to clip. Click on artist name for bio, CDs & more."

It's official: I'm and old fogey. I haven't even heard half of these.

Just LIke Heaven

Well, it's happened again. While you were watching Garcon Stupide or maybe The Constant Gardner, I was out rotting my brain cells at Just Like Heaven, which is so predictable that you may find yourself reciting all the plot points after you've seen the first ten minutes. That doesn't mean that Reese Witherspoon and Mark Ruffalo aren't charming enough to pull it off. They are. Even when the movie is violating its own internal logic, you might not care because it's big-hearted and funny.

I wanted to see Lord of War, I really did, but the sad fact of the matter is that I now choose movies pretty much by the times of their screenings, and Lord of War just didn't work. That's OK. I had a few laughs and didn't feel terribly manipulated (since I pretty much knew what was coming). What more can you ask for two bucks?

I Hope He Gets Crappy Mileage

IOL: Luxury van has all the comforts of home...: "London - The world's largest luxury camping van, which cost more than 1-million pounds (almost R12-million) to build, has been custom made for an oil sheik.

Austrian company Action Mobil built the 12-metre-long vehicle for use on long desert trips, with a huge 13-litre, 600hp engine.

The Desert Challenger took one-and-a-half-years to construct and includes a lavishly furnished living room and a state-of-the-art kitchen."

Yes, We Have More Bananas

A week or so back I wrote a short post about my banana crop. All I know about bananas I learned from Harry Belafonte (they "hide the deadly black tarantula"), but apparently the growing season isn't over, and the crop will be larger than I thought. As you can see in this photo, there's a new bunch of bananas beginning to take shape, and the blossoms are still there on the tips of the fruit. Looks as if this will be a small bunch, and I might not harvest it until nearly winter.

Dr. Grammar

Dr. Grammar - Frequently Asked Questions: "The Dr. Grammar Frequently Asked Questions page contains answers to questions previously asked of Dr. Grammar that may provide help with your grammar questions. The questions are listed alphabetically, so they can be searched quickly and easily. Browse through the list of questions from the list below to find help on your topic or, if you want a Complete Reference List, click here or, if you want to search the Dr. Grammar FAQs, click here."

I picked this link up over at Pop Culture Junk Mail, and it warms the cockles of an old English teacher's heart.

Stark House Press Does Randisi

Stark House Press has another double volume in its continuing series. I've praised Stark House here several times, and Greg Shepard keeps doing great work. This new book reprints two novels by Bob Randisi, one of the most prolific writers of our time. It also has an introduction by Randisi and a bibliography what will astound you. (Well, it astounded me, and I thought I knew about everything Bob has written. I didn't.)

The book is worth its price for the intro and bibliography alone, but it also contains two novels, The Ham Reporter and The Disappearance of Penny. The first is a historical novel about Bat Masterson in the days when he was a sportswriter in New York City, where he teams up with Damon Runyon to look for a missing friend. This is probably my favorite of Randisi's books, but I also like The Disappearance of Penny, which was the first of his books that I ever read. It's about Henry Po, who works for the New York Racing Commission, and once again there's a missing person. It's Randisi's first published novel, which I have in a nice old paperback that's become fairly hard to find. Thanks to Stark House, you can now read it without having to search for it.

This new double volume isn't available until December. Put it on your Christmas list.

Ummmm, Canned Squirrel

Tri-State Neighbor: Country Living: "'I had never canned jams and jellies so we tried that. This year we are going to add jalapeno pepper jelly and canned squirrel. The canned squirrel was Smokey's idea. We asked the Fair Board to add it to the list of acceptable items and they did,' Maurer said."

Coming to DVD -- The Rockford Files

DVD Times - The Rockford Files Season 1 (R1) in December: "Universal Studios Home Video have announced the Region 1 DVD release of The Rockford Files: Season One for 6th December 2005 priced at $39.98 SRP. James Garner stars as Jim Rockford, a private investigator who lives and works in his trailer in Malibu, Los Angeles in the popular television crime series The Rockford Files."

Thanks to Thrilling Days of Yesteryear and Something Old, Nothing New for the tip. Lee Goldberg has a mention, too.

The Window with the Sleeping Nude -- Robert Leslie Bellem

I'd been wanting to read this book for years, but I hadn't been able to find an affordable copy. Finally a sort of ratty one turned up on eBay, so I bought it. I was hoping for something along the lines of Bellem's Dan Turner stories, but that's not what I found. Nothing in the novel rises to the level of the divine zaniness of Turner's escapades, and Barney Cunard is no Dan Turner. Still, it's a fast-moving (and short, at 120 pages) story of a nude body in a department store window, with enough complications to keep things interesting. Who knew that deparment stores in the '40s were staffed by so many gorgeous women? Bellem loves describing them, especially their important assets. So the book was fun to read as a period piece, but a little disappointing. Nice cover, though.

Sue Feder, R. I. P.

Sue Feder
FEDER, Sue On September 9, 2005, SUE FEDER MILLER of Towson by way of Brooklyn. Beloved wife of Larry Miller, loving daughter of Marvin and Rhoda Feder, dear sister of Nanette and Richard Williams and Mitchell Feder, adoring aunt of Eric and Alex Williams and Melanie and Andrea Feder. Services and Interment private. In lieu of flowers, contributions may be made to the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society or Baltimore Jewish Cultural Chauvrah. Arrangements by THE JOHNSON FUNERAL HOME, P.A. Published in the Baltimore Sun from 9/11/2005 - 9/12/2005.

I was lucky enough to know Sue, having met her through DAPA-EM and talked and joked with her at a lot of mystery conventions. She never seemed to get depressed or to lose her sense of humor. She was one of the good guys, and I'll miss her a lot.

Fiddlers -- Ed McBain

I've mentioned my admiration of Evan Hunter (aka Ed McBain, among many other pseudonyms) before. Here, here, and here, for example. So it was with a little bit of sadness and regret that I picked up Fiddlers, which, because of McBain's recent death, is probably the last of the 87th Precinct novels.

McBain hasn't lost a step with age or illness. I'm sure you can think of a writer or two who should have stopped writing long before the end of a long career, like an athlete who plays one season too long. McBain wasn't one of those writers. He's just as sharp now as he was when I first read one of his books more than 50 years ago. Maybe sharper. I think that his body of work is about as impressive as that of any writer during the second half of the 20th century.

For me, it was impossible to read Fiddlers without having McBain's final illness in mind, and I'm convinced that he had it in mind, too. Just how much, I'm not sure. Is the book a grim joke in its own way? Autobiographical in any sense? I don't know. I do know that it's a typically well-written procedural with appearances by Steve Carella, Meyer, Bert Kling, Cotton Hawes, and Fat Ollie Weeks tracking down a serial killer. The stories of their personal lives aren't resolved, exactly, but I think readers who have been following them for many years, as I have, will be satisfied with their final appearances.

When I closed the book, I thought, "Well, that's it." But it's not. I can always go back and start over at the beginning of the series with books like The Mugger and The Pusher. I probably won't, but the possiblity is always there. McBain will be around for a long, long time.

9/11