Thursday, August 25, 2016

Alvin Crime Report

The other morning about 3:00, several car loads of cops descended on the house next door to me.  Flashing light bars, floodlights, the whole deal.  My neighbor, I hasten to add, was totally innocent of any wrongdoing.  His pickup had been stolen from his driveway and used as a battering ram on a local convenience store.  The cops were making sure he wasn't part of the gang who did the deed.  At the same time his pickup was stolen, a van was stolen from a driveway across town.  The gang members used the van to haul away the ATM they took from the convenience store after battering down the wall.  The Houston cops later found the van and the emptied ATM.  The battering and taking of the ATM are all on video, but the gang all wore masks, so finding them is unlikely.  It created some excitement for the neighborhood, but we're once more quiet again.

This has been your Alvin Crime Report.

8 comments:

August West said...

Remember Willie Sutton's famous answer when the reporter asked him "Why he robbed banks." Today we can add ATMs to his answer.

Jeff Meyerson said...

How old is the neighbor?

Unknown said...

He's about my age, may a little older.

Jeff Meyerson said...

So...not a likely gang member, then.

Unknown said...

Not likely at all. We've been neighbors ever since I moved here in 1983, and so far he's kept his nose clean.

Todd Mason said...

Except for what's buried in the basement.

This sounds like a Dortmund caper, somehow. Where's the dog who runs off with the loot bag?

Dan said...

Been me, I'd a run 'im in and grilled him just on general principles. It don't pay to take chances with these scum.

Cap'n Bob said...

In a related story, author Bill Crider says he has enough money to keep the VBKs in food for as long as they live.