Friday, March 04, 2016

How to Steal the Mona Lisa and Six Other World-Famous Treasures -- Taylor Bayouth

Caper fans and potential heist artists, this is the book you've been looking for.  It provides detailed plans for stealing not just the Mona Lisa but the Hope Diamond, the Archaeopteryx Lithographica, Rodin's Thinker, King Tut's death mask, Queen Elizabeth's crown, and the Codex Leicester.

The first step, as always, is the easiest: You have to buy the book.  After that, everything is laid out for you in clear, simple language that takes you step-by-step through the crime, from the planning stages to the aftermath.  There are even diagrams.  

Let's suppose you're going for the Hope Diamond in the Smithsonian's Museum of Natural History.   It's so easy to break into the building that you're going to have to do it twice, once to position a Go-Pro camera to steal the password to the computer security system that controls the place.  Piece of cake, as you're even told the number or screws (12) on one of the panels you'll have to remove to get out of the air ducts, which is where you and your trusty folding stepladder will be as you sneak around to reach your goal.  Don't worry about those screws, as you'll also have your cordless drill with you.  All necessary tools are listed.

This is all entertaining stuff, and some of you might get some good story ideas from of it.  Some of you might wind up very rich.  Others might wind up in prison, as I guess I should mention here the disclaimer at the front of the book:  "The material within is intended to be a parody.  Please do not attempt any of the techniques or heists described herein."  We all know they had to put that in there to protect themselves, and I'm sure all the material is authentic.  Check it out.


Jeffrey Meyerson said...

Didn't they steal the Mona Lisa in 1911? I don't see them taking The Thinker, however, as it weighs too much.

Bill Crider said...

That's all covered in the book.

Jeffrey Meyerson said...

I checked and my memory isn't gone yet. It was 1911. I'm guessing the Thinker theft might have something to do with the dozen copies of the original.

Don Coffin said...

Actually, Jeff, Rodin did a bunch of them, different scales...also of his second most famous piece (at least two versions), The Kiss (,